Tangled Cords

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him- a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”

I have read the above passage multiple times. Reading it again recently the word, “quickly” flashed like a neon sign. I have heard this passage misquoted many, many times. Most commonly it is misquoted as, “A threefold cord can NOT be broken”.

As you read the passage in its context, you will come to see that this passage is about relationship. God loves relationship. God created man for relationship. First the relationship of The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit. Yes, the Holy Trinity… the first relationship… existed before the creation of the world, before the creation of man. God created the entire universe, then God created man. It was good. Then came the creation of the second relationship, the relationship of God (The Trinity) to man. Then God in his pure love, God saw that man was not complete being alone on the Earth. The solution: me. No just kidding. The solution: woman. Formed from man, God created woman. Thus, the third relationship. It was good; it was very good. It was the threefold cord.

So what went wrong with this perfect union? The union of God, Man, Woman… the epitome of the threefold cord? The answer is sin.

Sin entered into the hearts of man and woman. Sin entered into the perfect world God created. Sin broke the threefold cord. But it did not break quickly. It was a slow unraveling of the threefold cord.

While it is debated but not concretely known… many theologians believe that Adam was approximately 40 years old when Eve was created, then another 40 years before sin entered the world. There is a lot of symbolism in the number 40 but we will look at that on another day. My point here is that from the creation of a perfect world, a creation of the perfect relationship with God, Man and Woman… the threefold cord slowly unraveled then broke.

It is the exact same way today.

Relationships do not break quickly. Families do not break quickly. Lives are not destroyed quickly. It is all a slow unraveling… a slow break in the threefold cord.

The unraveling begins each time the man or the woman do not act in love, do not act in faith, and/or do not act in obedience to God. In living color it looks a lot like this:

• A deleted text.
• A call silently sent to voicemail.
• A deleted email.
• A glace that becomes a thought that becomes an action.
• A missed worship service because… I am too tired, too busy, too sick, too…
• An “I want it this way, so..”
• An I am sleeping in the other room to prove a point.
• An YOU should change.

You see, the list can go on an on. The point is that every time one party in the threefold cord acts in deception, in selfishness, in pride, in anger, in bitterness or in resentment the threefold cord begins to unravel. With each unraveling the threefold cord eventually breaks… letting go of everything once held together in the safety and unity of a threefold cord.

So how can we stop the unraveling?

We stop the unraveling by taking a hard look in the mirror and mustering the courage to get real and to get honest with ourselves about who we are, who we have become, and our own unraveling of the threefold cord.

This.

This is where my journey with you shifts. If you are not ready to stop your own unraveling then you may want to turn back here. You see… I have stood in the mirror for the last 72 hours and decided that it is time to take responsibility for my own unraveling. Though I have attempted this multiple times in the past, this time is completely different. Why? Why is this time different? Because I am sick of myself; I am done pretending, and I am dizzy from walking in the same deadly circle.

So here goes…

Over the next 135 days I will be logging onto this site daily (or as often as the Appalachian Trail allows) to share my journey from abuse, adultery, shame, trauma and addiction to total freedom. My purpose for doing this is to stand toe-to-toe with everything I have denied, covered-up, avoided, just plain ‘ole lied about, and/or blamed on others.

I am doing this because I am ready to be free. I am doing this because I want YOU to be free too.

Tomorrow I will start at the trailhead of this journey and I will share my first raw story with you. In the meantime… if you are ready to take this journey with me, I challenge you to go stand in front of the mirror. Who is staring back at you? How many cords are you holding in your hand… or are you really holding them at all?